Yesterday I decided to throw caution and "responsibility" to the wind. I left school early (5 pm) and went out to Michaels and Books a Million with two friends. After that I went out to a Bible study with two more friends. After visiting at Bible study I stopped at the studio which turned into an impromptu Kroger run with my Chinese friend there and then ended in a long chat with one of our newest grad students. After I finally got home I did my Chinese homework and then visited with one of my roommates till about 3 am. Can I just say that that is probably the most one-on-one visiting I've done all semester? I see people in groups frequently, but I rarely get to go out with one or two friends to do anything. It was SO nice. Except I knew I would be tired all day today because of my lack of sleep.
(coffee with friends)Turns out I wasn't because I slept through my alarm and missed my Chinese class. Oops! Once I woke up and realized what I did I decided that I just didn't care. I made breakfast, ate it in bed and did a Bible study and it felt so nice.
I give up eating regularly, sleeping regularly, spending time with my friends, spending time with Jesus, working out, etc., to do school. It consumes me and I always feel like I'm behind or not doing a good enough job. I feel worried that if I don't make great grades it will reflect on me badly and make me seem really lazy or apathetic. However in my frenzy to "succeed" at school and not come anywhere near the lines of failure academically I feel like I'm failing in my personal life to have a balanced, normal and healthy lifestyle. My room is a disaster. The only meal I ate yesterday was lunch. Today I rested, ate, visited with friends, got to participate in an outreach event on campus, and it was so very nice.
I've got to figure out this balance thing.