Sunday, February 9, 2014

On Making

I made a New Year resolution. It was to make at least one thing a week for the year of 2014. Small or big...the goal was just to be creative. I've already failed in a big way! I haven't done very much. I've started some stuff but haven't finished. And the burst of creative energy and enthusiasm that I was hoping for...yeah, still don't have it.

And I'm okay with that. Mostly. It's relieving to be able to not make things if I find it more stressful than fulfilling. It also makes me feel guilty too. In school I would just push through feelings of unmotivation and complete assignments. In school I also had a community to bounce ideas off of and share work with. I think that is part of it. Not having people to share art making with makes it lonely. And even though I've been here for about 7 months now, I'm still new and figuring things out. I am trying not to be lonely. I'm trying to get out there and do new things and meet new people.

However, even though I haven't made a lot of stuff personally, I did teach a two week ceramics class in January and am lined up to teach another next month. I really liked teaching! It's a little scary, but so fun to share something you care about with other people. Like I said, sharing art with a community is inspiring and helps me want to make. I want to teach more as opportunities present themselves. Also, I have lots of ideas planned out in my sketchbook and have pinned tons of ideas on Pinterest of things I would like to learn, try, and make. It's funny, teaching that class made me more inspired to make pots and other art. Probably because I felt a bit of that community again. :)

I suppose the real thing I'm trying to say right now is that I see myself in a place right now where it's hard to make art or craft. It's easy to feel like a failure. I finished art school and haven't done anything to speak of since then. But I am trying to think more long-term. I got hugely burnt out by the time I graduated. I've gone through a lot of changes...I am sure I have changed in some ways. I think I need this time to learn other things and have new experiences. And I'll count any little thing as an effort toward living a creative life. Even if it's just making and decorating cupcakes for my the ones pictured above. :)

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